Well+Being Holistic Mental Health
Emotional Health & Wellness Tips From The Therapy Couch And Other Places
Kimberly Seelbrede, LCSW, is a New York State licensed psychotherapist and women’s emotional health expert whose work weaves together the science of the mind, the biology of the brain, and the art of holistic integrative wellness. With nearly two decades of clinical experience, she helps women in midlife navigate the profound emotional, hormonal, and identity transitions that often surface during perimenopause and menopause. In addition, she works with couples to improve communication, strengthen emotional intimacy, and navigate changes in sexual health, relationship dynamics, and shared life stressors. She works with men who are experiencing personal and professional crises, life transitions, stress, mood changes, or relationship challenges. Her approach blends evidence-based psychotherapy with holistic mind-body interventions, including EMDR, Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic Experiencing® techniques, mindfulness, and lifestyle medicine — to address the full spectrum of emotional, physical, and spiritual wellbeing. Disclaimer: I am a licensed and fully credentialed mental health provider, but I am not a medical doctor. The information provided on this website is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical or health-related concerns, including perimenopause, menopause, hormone therapy, or other chronic medical conditions. Reliance on the content on this site is solely at your own risk.
Shyness, Social Anxiety, and the Hidden Toll of Coping with Alcohol: A NYC Therapist’s Perspective
Do you find yourself thinking in extremes? Are you someone who struggles with "all or nothing" thinking because sitting with conflicting emotions feels overwhelming? If so, you're not alone.
For many people, ambivalence—the experience of having mixed or contradictory feelings—is profoundly uncomfortable. We crave certainty, clarity, and a sense of control. Feeling torn can be anxiety-inducing. But in reality, ambivalence is a normal, healthy emotional state, and learning to tolerate it is a powerful skill that fosters resilience, flexibility, and emotional intelligence.
In dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), this process is known as walking the Middle Path—a practice that invites both acceptance and change. When we learn to hold space for opposing truths, we move toward balance, emotional maturity, and greater well-being.
What Is Ambivalence And Why Is It So Uncomfortable?
Ambivalence is the simultaneous presence of conflicting feelings—loving someone and feeling frustrated with them, wanting change but fearing what it might bring, feeling both hopeful and uncertain. Most people try to resolve ambivalence quickly, choosing one side over the other in an attempt to reduce inner tension.
But the truth is, trying to force clarity before it’s ready can lead to impulsive decisions, emotional reactivity, and chronic dissatisfaction. The path to greater peace often begins by learning to tolerate the discomfort of the "gray zone."
How The Middle Path Can Help You Break Free From Black-And-White Thinking
If you struggle with rigid thinking or emotional extremes, the following strategies can help you begin to embrace more nuance, flexibility, and inner calm.