within the scope of compassionate and informed psychological care

She comes to therapy because she’s suffering, though on the surface, no one would know. Her best friend seems to be sailing through menopause without a hitch, still sleeping soundly, still herself, while she quietly unravels. Her body aches in ways she can’t explain. Anxiety hums beneath everything. Sleep, once reliable, has turned against her. Mornings bring exhaustion; evenings bring dread. She’s lost interest in things she used to love, and she can’t name exactly what’s wrong — only that life feels dimmer, smaller, harder to hold together. Her husband says he misses her. She scrolls through advice columns and doctors’ websites but finds little that truly fits. She now mostly relies on Instagram and Facebook groups for support and additional resources, but it’s a challenge to know who and what to trust. The truth is, every woman’s experience of midlife is different. For some, it’s a gentle recalibration; for others, it’s a full-body scream, a neurological, hormonal, and emotional storm that touches every corner of being. In therapy, we begin by naming what’s happening, lifting it from the realm of shame or mystery and into understanding and knowledge so healing can finally begin.

As a psychotherapist and coach licensed in New York who works extensively with women in midlife and beyond, I see how often confusion, misinformation, and outdated medical narratives add unnecessary suffering to an already complex life stage.

The City That Never Sleeps Meets the Woman Who Can’t Either

In a city built on ambition, midlife can feel like an existential collision. You’ve spent years building — your career, your family, your identity — and suddenly, something shifts. Your body changes, your hormones fluctuate, and your clarity begins to blur. You find yourself asking questions that feel both urgent and unanswerable: Who am I now? Why am I so tired? Why does everything that used to motivate me now feel hollow?

In my New York City psychotherapy practice, I see this all the time — accomplished, self-aware women who have done everything “right” and still feel like their foundation has cracked. Midlife hits differently here. The pace is unrelenting, the pressure invisible yet constant, and the cultural expectation is that you’ll simply push through. But what I witness, session after session, is how this constant state of striving rewires the nervous system, draining resilience and disrupting hormonal balance. The mind begins to sprint while the body begs for stillness. And beneath it all, there’s often a quiet longing — not just to cope, but to rediscover meaning in a city that never pauses long enough to ask what truly matters.

At Holistic Therapy & Wellness NY, I help women unravel this pattern — not by pushing harder, but by learning to regulate the nervous system and reconnect with the body’s innate wisdom. Using a blend of EMDR, somatic awareness, mindfulness, and integrative psychotherapy, we gently untangle the emotional residue of decades spent in survival mode — the perfectionism, the self-sacrifice, the relentless drive to achieve. EMDR is particularly powerful in this stage of life because it helps the brain reprocess stress and trauma that have kept the system in high alert.