We are all born with unique attributes and qualities. If we are fortunate enough to have optimal circumstances and nurturance along the way, we develop into secure adults. Adults with secure attachment and relational capacity are able to have meaningful experiences and relationships. They feel safe in the world and with others. Secure individuals are free to thrive.

As it turns out, most of us have had more adversity than is helpful. While some adversity makes us strong (we develop skill and resilience), too much adversity threatens to overwhelm us. It interferes with growth, because we are unable to feel safe, explore the world and develop adaptive coping strategies. Reduced capacity to cope naturally leads to anxiety, depression, addictions, compulsions, eating disorders and other troubling symptoms. When symptoms and poor coping takes over, our ability to establish healthy relationships, maintain those relationships and function well in the world is diminished. Sometimes we are fortunate enough to make an important connection to begin the healing process. The therapeutic relationship is one way to begin to heal.

Mental health seems to be experiencing a time of less stigma and greater awareness. People seem to feel safe sharing their mental health struggles on social media. The pandemic certainly led to an increase in loneliness, isolation, anxiety and terror, which led many to seek therapy and counseling, sometimes for the first time. This exploration to find a therapist also led to a great deal of confusion. With so many potential therapists and different therapeutic orientations, the big question becomes, “what’s the right type of therapy for me?”

Many want a quick fix as they enter therapy. Of course, short-term models that offer skill building and concrete interventions have their place. The problem with this strategy is that it rarely moves the needle when it comes to true healing.

Some common reasons people reach out for therapy and counseling is to address their new or longstanding mental health challenges. Symptoms such as anxiety, depression, addiction, insomnia and lack of motivation are often so debilitating that they are unable to live the life they desire. In my experience, psychiatric medications are essential for many, and truly life saving. But for those who have not had success with traditional psychiatry, it’s worth considering the highly-effective natural solutions that are rarely offered in conventional medicine.

Many mental health symptoms are all indications that levels of neurotransmitters such as serotonin, GABA, and the catecholamines dopamine and norepinephrine (there are more) are low. This is otherwise known as neurotransmitter dysfunction or imbalance. There are four main neurotransmitters involved with mood and behavior, and they are: serotonin, GABA, endorphins and the catecholamines (dopamine/Norepinephrine). The main focus with Amino Acid Therapy in clinical practice is on the serotonin-catecholamine system. Low levels of each of these, lead to a very specific pattern of mental health symptoms. It’s important to know that there are many reasons why brains become depleted and imbalanced, such as, trauma, chronic stress, chronic pain, loss, poor nutrition, addiction, hormonal changes and genetic predisposition, and thankfully, there are effective and powerful ways to restore brain health.

Our bodies need amino acids to work properly, and they are crucial to metabolic function. Some amino acids are made by the body, and others come from your diet. Typically, when you consume a protein, your body breaks it down and what's left is the amino acid. Amino acids are precursors to neurotransmitters, and when these vital messengers are deficient or imbalanced, information is not relayed optimally in the brain, and symptoms arise. Amino acid therapy aims to heal and restore the brain to optimal functioning by supplementing what’s missing based on history, symptoms, behaviors and response to trial treatment.

For as long as you can remember, others have labeled you as “too shy” or “too sensitive.” It sure doesn’t feel good to hear this, but it does describe your reality on the daily. Thinking about it, you’ve always felt alone, or very different. You may be more reactive than most to the moods of others, criticism can feel especially hostile, external stimuli and energy drains you. These are just a few examples of what it’s like as a Highly-Sensitive Person (HSP), also known as deep-feelers, neurodivergent individuals and Sensory-Processing Sensitivity (SPS). Navigating a noisy, demanding world as a highly-sensitive person can be disabling for many especially as you attempt to accommodate and manage the accompanying anxiety and depression. But remember, sensitive folks have great gifts. They tend to experience high levels of perceptivity and intuition, empathy and super-attunement, and even high levels of creativity. Sometimes, your exquisite sensitivity feels like a gift; it can also feel like a curse. Please know that you are not alone and you do not need to suffer in silence.

Guided Meditation is a resource for relaxation and a type of focused meditation to help create calm and ease in the mind and body. With this technique for relaxation, you concentrate on an image, place, object, sound, or experience that feels soothing or grounding, offering refuge from your daily stressors, settling your nervous system. The goal is to promote a calm state in the mind and body through relaxation and mindfulness. Your nervous system should begin to follow your thoughts and reset. You may have noticed that if you think about stressful events, you experience tension in your body, your mind may race and heart rate and blood pressure follow. If you train yourself to take moments in your day to focus your awareness on something pleasant, your mind and body will relax. You may notice less tension in your body and a sense of ease. Having a practice such as guided imagery can help you better handle your daily stressors and develop a sense of vitality and resilience.

Breakups are painful. The reasons for the relationship split seem to matter less than the fact that your world has changed and all kinds of uncomfortable feelings and emotions are being triggered. You can learn from this experience and come through it wiser and stronger, and hopefully, with a heart open enough to receive love and hope for the future. As a NYC psychotherapist in private practice, struggling after a break up is a common reason people seek counseling and therapy.

Even though the relationship no longer works, why do breakups hurt so much? When marriages or relationships end, it is not just about grieving the loss of the connection, but the end of shared hopes and dreams. Hope is an important aspect of early romantic relationships. Couples mourn the hope for the future as well as the commitment of shared goals and dreams. 

Other important losses include one's identity, physical and sexual intimacy, shared hobbies and interests, relationships with friends and extended family, a physical move or the sale of a home, financial stability, individual and shared responsibilities, and if children are involved, a significant disruption in their lives.

Starting over can be scary. It is normal to wonder if you will ever find love or another partner again as well as other future uncertainties. Many feel that staying with what they know, even if it's an unhappy partnership, is better than being alone. It's important to remind yourself, that it is possible to move on to find happiness either alone or with someone else. Healing takes time and recovery requires patience and treating yourself with kindness and compassion. 

As a psychotherapist with advanced training in neuroscience and mind-body medicine, I often hear from my New York City clients that they’re struggling with chronic stress, anxiety, depression, or insomnia. Many of them have already tried everything—from melatonin and prescription medications to meditation apps—but continue to feel stuck in the same frustrating cycle: they can’t sleep, they can’t relax, and they feel chronically depleted.

The long-term impact of disrupted sleep and chronic stress is well documented in both neuroscience and mental health research. And what many of my clients don’t realize is this: the nervous system itself holds the key to deep restoration—and it starts with something as simple and profound as your breath.

What Is Psychophysiologic Insomnia?

You might be surprised to learn that many people suffer from what's called psychophysiologic insomnia, also known as "learned insomnia." This type of sleep disruption often begins with a few stressful nights but soon becomes a habitual pattern where the body starts to anticipate stress at bedtime. The result? Heightened arousal, anxiety, and conditioned sleeplessness.

Many clients turn to medication, and while this can help in the short term, it’s often not a sustainable long-term strategy. In therapy, I focus on evidence-based lifestyle changes to regulate your nervous system and restore the brain’s natural sleep cycles—without dependence on medication.

(by Kim Seelbrede, originally posted on urbanzen.org)

The Healing Power of Self-Care for Nurses: A Reflection on Urban Zen Integrative Therapy at the NSNA Convention

As delicate snowflakes danced across the Utah sky, a sea of passionate and ambitious nursing students gathered in Salt Lake City for the 59th Annual National Student Nurses Association (NSNA) Convention. Beneath the buzz of clinical discussion and future-focused enthusiasm, a quieter and more essential invitation was extended to these frontline caregivers: to pause, to receive, and to restore.

In a serene space known as The Sanctuary—generously provided by Johnson & Johnson as part of their Campaign for Nursing’s Future—student nurses were welcomed into the calming embrace of Urban Zen Integrative Therapy (UZIT). It was here that many of them experienced, for the very first time, the profound impact of receiving care instead of providing it.

Nurses, Self-Neglect, and the Culture of Overgiving

The nursing profession is one of devotion, long hours, emotional labor, and unrelenting resilience. Nurses are celebrated as compassionate givers—but rarely taught the parallel art of receiving. In fact, many nurses internalize the idea that self-care is indulgent, or worse, selfish. As burnout and compassion fatigue become chronic conditions within the field, a new conversation must emerge: How do we care for the caretakers?

What many nurses are not taught in school—but urgently need—is the practical, embodied experience of self-care. Not a buzzword, not a spa day, but a deep nervous system reset. A return to being rather than constant doing. This is the heart of the Urban Zen Integrative Therapy model.

Creating a Healing Environment for Healing Professionals

Inside The Sanctuary, student nurses were guided through gentle restorative yoga poses, supported by skilled Urban Zen Integrative Therapists offering Reiki, essential oil therapy, and mindful breath awareness techniques. The results were immediate, visible, and profound. Stressed shoulders softened. Eyes welled with tears of release. Breathing slowed. Presence returned.

As one nurse quietly shared, “You’ve inspired me to take time for myself—to breathe and rest. I didn’t know how to do this.” Another student confided, “I feel blessed to have met you today. I’m finally able to be ‘in’ my body.”

These reflections speak to a deep and unmet need in the nursing profession: the need to feel safe enough to slow down and reconnect with the body. The need to be more than a set of hands. To feel held, witnessed, and restored.

Why Nurses Need More Than a Reminder—They Need a Roadmap

Nurses are often told to care for themselves, yet few are taught how. The Urban Zen Foundation responds to this gap with a practical and nourishing self-care curriculum that blends Eastern healing traditions with Western science—designed by healthcare professionals, for healthcare professionals. This model includes:

• Breathwork to regulate the nervous system

• Restorative movement to release tension

• Aromatherapy to shift emotional states and stimulate the limbic system

• Reiki to restore energetic balance

• Mindfulness practices to create calm and improve focus

These are not just self-care techniques. They are professional survival tools. When nurses are given permission and guidance to nourish themselves, they show up more fully—not only for patients but for their own lives.

Reclaiming Wholeness in a Fragmented System

The burnout crisis in healthcare is not simply about long hours and heavy caseloads—it’s about disconnection. Nurses have been trained to override their own needs for the sake of others. This disconnection from the self is unsustainable. Without intentional practices of reconnection, even the most skilled and passionate caregivers will feel depleted.

Our time in Salt Lake City was a call to action. As healthcare professionals and advocates, we must do more than remind nurses to take care of themselves—we must equip them with the knowledge, experiences, and embodied tools to make that care accessible and sustainable.

Healing Trauma: How Holistic Psychotherapy Can Help You Reclaim Safety, Stability, and Emotional Freedom

Trauma changes the brain—but healing does too.

At Holistic Psychotherapy & Wellness NY, we understand that trauma—whether it’s a single overwhelming event or a history of chronic, developmental adversity—can fundamentally alter your nervous system, sense of safety, and ability to trust yourself and others. But we also know that with the right therapeutic support, the brain and body have an extraordinary capacity to rewire, rebuild, and recover.

Trauma Rewires The Brain—But So Does Healing

When traumatic experiences go unprocessed, they can keep the nervous system stuck in survival mode. Over time, the brain creates protective loops that perpetuate hyperarousal, emotional numbing, flashbacks, and a persistent feeling that the world is unsafe. These patterns are reinforced through repeated rumination, re-telling, and avoidance, deepening the grip trauma has on daily life.

The good news? Neuroplasticity—the brain’s natural ability to form new neural connections—allows us to release old trauma loops and build pathways rooted in safety, connection, and regulation. Therapy can support this transformation by offering resourcing, co-regulation, and reparative experiences that tell the body and brain: it’s safe to heal now.

“It’s Not Safe To Be Well”: The Hidden Belief That Keeps Trauma Alive

Many trauma survivors come to therapy with a surprising inner conflict—they deeply want to heal, yet feel resistance to feeling “well” or “whole.” This resistance is often rooted in a subconscious belief: if I relax, I won’t be ready for danger. Healing may feel unsafe, even threatening.

This belief is a survival strategy. After all, if you’ve been harmed before, staying hyper-vigilant can feel protective. But this chronic stress response blocks access to joy, connection, and rest. At Holistic Psychotherapy & Wellness NY, we work gently to explore and reprocess these beliefs so that you can begin to experience wellness without fear.

What Does Trauma-Informed Healing Involve?

Each healing journey is unique. Whether you’re struggling with the effects of childhood trauma, sexual trauma, emotional abuse, medical trauma, or PTSD, our practice supports you in cultivating safety—internally and externally—before processing painful memories.

We offer therapy for trauma using modalities like:

Understanding the Link Between Depression, Inflammation, and Mind-Body Healing

As a holistic psychotherapist in New York City, I frequently work with high-functioning professionals, creatives, and individuals navigating emotional and physical symptoms that overlap. Many clients come to therapy reporting concerns such as fatigue, low energy, insomnia, body aches, loss of interest in daily activities, reduced libido, social withdrawal, and appetite changes.

While these symptoms often resemble depression, the underlying cause isn’t always psychological. Chronic inflammation and physiological stress can also manifest as mood changes and emotional distress. At Holistic Psychotherapy & Wellness NY, I take an integrative approach—helping clients address emotional pain while exploring contributing physical and lifestyle factors.

What Is the Connection Between Depression and Inflammation?

Emerging research reveals a strong, bidirectional relationship between inflammation and depression. According to the American Journal of Psychiatry, chronic inflammation can contribute to depressive symptoms—and depression itself may activate inflammatory processes in the body.

Inflammation plays a role in several chronic health conditions, including:

• Type 2 diabetes

• Cardiovascular disease

• Metabolic syndrome

• Rheumatoid arthritis

• Multiple sclerosis

• Asthma

• Psoriasis

• Chronic pain syndromes

These conditions are also associated with an increased risk of depression and anxiety.

What Causes Chronic Inflammation?

Inflammation is the body’s natural response to injury, trauma, or infection. However, when inflammation becomes chronic or systemic, it can create a cascade of physical and emotional health problems. Contributing factors include:

• Chronic stress and elevated cortisol

• Poor diet and blood sugar instability

• Hormonal imbalances

• Food allergies and intolerances

• Environmental toxins

• Hidden infections

• Sleep deprivation

• Over- or under-exercising

If you experience persistent depressive symptoms, pain, or fatigue—and lab markers such as C-reactive protein (CRP) are elevated—it may be time to address inflammation as part of your wellness plan.

Do you find yourself thinking in extremes? Are you someone who struggles with "all or nothing" thinking because sitting with conflicting emotions feels overwhelming? If so, you're not alone.

For many people, ambivalence—the experience of having mixed or contradictory feelings—is profoundly uncomfortable. We crave certainty, clarity, and a sense of control. Feeling torn can be anxiety-inducing. But in reality, ambivalence is a normal, healthy emotional state, and learning to tolerate it is a powerful skill that fosters resilience, flexibility, and emotional intelligence.

In dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), this process is known as walking the Middle Path—a practice that invites both acceptance and change. When we learn to hold space for opposing truths, we move toward balance, emotional maturity, and greater well-being.

What Is Ambivalence And Why Is It So Uncomfortable?

Ambivalence is the simultaneous presence of conflicting feelings—loving someone and feeling frustrated with them, wanting change but fearing what it might bring, feeling both hopeful and uncertain. Most people try to resolve ambivalence quickly, choosing one side over the other in an attempt to reduce inner tension.

But the truth is, trying to force clarity before it’s ready can lead to impulsive decisions, emotional reactivity, and chronic dissatisfaction. The path to greater peace often begins by learning to tolerate the discomfort of the "gray zone."

How The Middle Path Can Help You Break Free From Black-And-White Thinking

If you struggle with rigid thinking or emotional extremes, the following strategies can help you begin to embrace more nuance, flexibility, and inner calm.

This week in my eating disorder seminar, we revisited the concept of distress tolerance—the quiet, powerful skills we call upon when emotions feel overwhelming. As we explored how to navigate emotional intensity, I found myself reflecting on one of the most grounding practices we have: radical acceptance.

In a culture that urges us to fight, fix, or fake our feelings, radical acceptance invites something entirely different. It asks us to soften. To lean into the truth of what is, without judgment or resistance. It doesn’t mean we approve of pain or give up hope. It means we stop fighting reality—and begin meeting ourselves with compassion and clarity.

What Does Radical Acceptance Look Like?

1. Choosing to accept, fully and from within
   True acceptance isn’t performative or forced. It’s not bypassing, and it’s not pretending. It comes from within, and it begins with the willingness to be honest about what’s here.

2. Recognizing that pain is part of being human
   Every one of us experiences fear, sorrow, grief, shame, and heartbreak. These emotions are not flaws. They are evidence of aliveness. When we stop judging our pain, we begin to suffer less.

3. Stopping the fight against reality
   Resisting emotions often amplifies them. Avoiding pain often deepens our distress. Radical acceptance helps us release the exhausting need to control what cannot be controlled. And in doing so, we begin to make space for peace.

It’s not the emotion itself that overwhelms us. It’s the struggle against it.

Improving the Moment: Skills from DBT Therapy

When radical acceptance feels out of reach, distress tolerance skills from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can help us get through the moment without making things worse. One helpful acronym is IMPROVE, which offers small, doable strategies to shift your state and calm your nervous system.

Imagery
Visualize a safe or peaceful place. Allow yourself to engage all your senses. Imagine what you see, hear, smell, and feel in that space. Let your body respond as if it were real.

(by Kim Seelbrede, originally posted on urbanzen.org, Nov 10, 2010)

Mark Hyman, MD Returns to Urban Zen: A Functional Medicine Approach to Reversing Diabesity and Chronic Disease

The Urban Zen Center was honored to welcome back Mark Hyman, MD, a visionary leader in functional medicinewho lovingly refers to Urban Zen as his "second home." On October 30, 2010, a packed studio gathered in the heart of New York City’s West Village for a full-day workshop on one of the most urgent health crises of our time: Diabesity—a metabolic epidemic at the intersection of obesity, insulin resistance, and type 2 diabetes.

Dr. Hyman, a best-selling author and founder of The UltraWellness Center, delivered a compelling, science-backed message: chronic disease is not inevitable—and it is often reversible through lifestyle and systems-based medicine.

Understanding Diabesity: A National Health Crisis

“Diabesity” is the term Dr. Hyman uses to describe a spectrum of metabolic dysfunction that ranges from mild blood sugar imbalances to full-blown type 2 diabetes. And the numbers are staggering:

• Nearly 3 out of 4 Americans are classified as overweight or obese.

• 1 in 3 military volunteers is considered unfit for service due to obesity.

• Children today may be the first generation not expected to outlive their parents.

This epidemic isn’t just a public health concern—it’s been labeled a national security threat by military leaders.

Dr. Hyman challenged us to rethink what we’ve been told about health and disease. The problem, he explained, is not genetic fate or bad luck—it’s the failure of conventional medicine to address the root causes of chronic disease. Instead of masking symptoms, we must treat the whole system. That’s where functional medicine steps in.

Functional Medicine: Treating Root Causes, Not Just Symptoms

Throughout the day, Dr. Hyman introduced key concepts that underpin his functional medicine approach, including:

• Epigenetics & Nutrigenomics: We may carry genes for disease, but lifestyle choices can influence whether those genes are expressed. By addressing nutrient intake, inflammation, and cellular stress, we can “turn down” harmful genes and “turn up” healing ones.

On a crisp autumn day in the West Village, the Urban Zen Center hosted acclaimed physician and nutrition researcher Dr. Neal Barnard, founder of the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine. The focus of the event? Winning weight battles, curbing food cravings, and reversing chronic disease through the power of a plant-based diet.

Titled “Winning Weight Battles and Conquering Cravings,” the six-hour workshop offered guests a rich blend of nutrition science, practical strategies, and mouthwatering vegan food demonstrations—all centered on addressing the epidemic of food addiction and the growing burden of lifestyle-related disease in America.

Food Addiction And The Brain: The Science Behind The Cravings

Dr. Barnard explained that common comfort foods—especially cheese, chocolate, meat, and sugar—can trigger addictive responses in the brain. These foods stimulate the release of dopamine, the brain’s “feel-good” neurotransmitter, through mechanisms similar to those seen in substance addiction.

When we consume these foods regularly, the brain learns to associate them with reward and pleasure, making it difficult to resist cravings. This neurological loop can lead to overeating, weight gain, insulin resistance, and increased risk for chronic conditions like diabetes, heart disease, and even depression.

According to Dr. Barnard, the food industry, backed by government subsidies and aggressive marketing, capitalizes on this natural craving response—creating a cycle that’s hard to break without intentional dietary change.